benedictionary

practical joking 101 - lesson 1: the saltshaker

2006-05-30T12:42:22Z

hallelujah, finland won!

2006-05-22T08:11:51Z

lordi won the eurovision song contest. this was the first win ever to finland.

...it's like gwar winning the mtv music award as best hiphop act.

eurodance vs. monster-hard-rock

0 : 1

thank you europe!

update: watch the scene

what to do with ichat...

2005-06-06T11:56:41Z

nothing rhymes with "pope"

2005-05-27T14:53:00Z

first of all: damn you pope benedikt 16. for choosing that silly name! very smart.

and people of germany: stop selling his stupid stuff on ebay! nobody wants a volkswagen for 188000 euro and nobody wants to live in his bachelor-apartment of ww2.

for all your ipod shuffle needs...

2005-03-11T15:38:21Z

today i eventually got my ipod after waiting for 4 weeks. now it seems to take that time again to charge the accumulators. i wonder if....

"lucky bastard"

2005-03-11T12:19:44Z

this is my randomly determined lucky number for the 25million euro jackpot of the german lotterie. what a coincidence.

i'm sooooo adorable?

2005-03-04T14:10:16Z

What weird misc. thing are you?

Fish eating spaghetti

You are absolutely adorable. I want to pick you up and sqeeze you until noodles come out of your nose.

Click Here to Take This Quiz
Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

dresden dolls - hamburg

2005-03-03T12:41:33Z

the dresden dolls played the logo in hamburg last night. hamburg is a crappy town - the city of foreigners (nobody knows anybody, i suppose). anyway: thanks to my friend sascha i already had tickets, since the show was totally sold out. it was awesome! the very best concert i've been to this year. there was a moment of wonder, when amanda came up with an interpretation of "seeräuber jenny" by kurt weill (text by bertold brecht) from the "threepenny opera" - in german! wow! i loved it. the best interpretation of that song (sorry kerstin and annette) i ever heard. i wondered, if the dresden dolls had more in stock of weill/brecht, kreisler, hollaender etc., but that was the only one they played. then there were coversongs like "life on mars" by david bowie and "war pigs" by black sabbath, which i liked very much. from the feeling in my throat i must conclude, that i have enjoyed it very frenetically. you bet! they are both dazzling charismatic and great live-musicians. i couldn't stand to thank amanda personally after the show. how pathetically juvenile. *gg*

dear dresden dolls,

next time, when you play northern germany would you mind coming to bremen instead of hamburg? the latter one really sucks and the people are culturally challenged there. hereby i most cordially invite you to bremen (where you can have more beck's beer - which you seemed to like very much - after all it's where it comes from).

when it's time to party, we will party hard

2005-02-22T14:20:21Z

my birthday party on saturday was major fun. the motto was it to hold a mourning ceremony for my adolescence now passed. as i mentioned before, my life clock turned 30 (RENEWAL!!). so i turned my living room into some kind of chapel and my minibar into a devotion shrine, with condolence book, big candles and the silliest photo of myself i could find.

actually everybody attended in appropriate costumes, like weeping widows, the mourning polo partner and even the obligatory drunken uncle. i even got a serenade sung by a friend, who is a professional classic singer. she sung the best version of "ave maria" i ever heard *lol*. accompanied by another friend ( and neighbour) and professional pianist on my organ. thank you julia and kerstin!!!!!

where i come from people eat very dry cake and drink very strong booze at funeral parties. so that's what we did in the rest of the first part of the show:

as you might have seen on the party schedule the second part was karaoke on my playstation 2. we found that the combination of mourning and singing is very satisfiable. i had to sing "three lions" of the "lightning seeds" and got 7500 points (eventhough i hate soccer)!! everybody had to sing and it was really hilarious. and then there was this incident with the whip and a dear person:
that's oh sooooo sweeeeet!!! :)

pictures by malte where there is also an article in german with photos on flickr

my friends and family gave plenty of stuff to me:

- first of all an ipod shuffle 1gb!
thank you julia, kerstin, sascha, bully, verena, mechthild, frank, johannes, immo, katrina, lukas, rene, janina and the rest of the bunch

- plus headset
thank you simone, matthias, katja, marco

- a comic book about bunny suicides
thank you once more rene and janina
that book kept me laughing for one hour straight!

- a book about "incredibly strange films" by re:search
thank you julie.
that thing is so weird and so very interesting! i would expect such a present from noone else. you are so cool!

- very much cake, more cake and even more cake

- not to forget the very large cake from my sisters as you can see above
thank you verena and mechthild and thank you for the obituary. ;)

- a betty page poster
thanks to kerstin. kinky als always!

- some handcrafted ceramic stuff
by annette and ute. thank you, too!

- last but far not least: tickets for the dresden dolls!!!
yeeehaw! thank you, sascha! you are so kind.

finally and iterating:
thank you so very much to everybody! it was a great party and i enjoyed it very much.

today is my 30th birthday

2005-02-15T17:31:06Z

so far i received 3 cakes.

sombra dolorosa

2005-02-15T17:18:22Z

a friend of mine, who is at the berlinale right now told me about a short film, they showed there:

sombra dolorosa
a mexican widow has to wrestle "el muerte" to save her daughter from her fate.... or something..... anyway see youself! i liked the "rolling out and eating dad" sequence.

a "shit" for iran?

2005-02-04T16:51:37Z

"f@(k this diplomatic actions shhhhhh...."

omg

2005-01-27T14:15:18Z

just when you think you reached some kind of normality:

i don't know how i did this. i just answered those question with best conscience. damn, if only the money i earn would reflect this result.

when satan ruled earth

2005-01-21T10:47:01Z

or: the "new" bush administration: "now showing our true colors...."

thanks to </a></b></a>nightrider i found the first photo of a bush that indicates the strange doings here presented. all pictures are official actual press images. the first three are from the inauguration ceremony jan 20th 2005. now i wonder: what are they trying to archieve? assimilate this gesture? so that no metalhead of the free world can raise his/her arm again without thinking of "w" doing the same?

do not let the bush annex your distinctive tokens!

let this be a warning to you all:

literacy - or how i stopped worrying and love the book

2005-01-06T14:04:39Z

my bookstack of the last month was very mingled to behold.

- those of you who already read "everything" of neal stephenson know zodiac. for me it was a great surprise, since i loved "snow crash" and "the diamond age". i wonder what had happend to neal? midlife-crisis? virility problems of other kinds? zodiac is some kind of macho-eco-thriller, where the protagonist (not hiro) is such a smartassing bastard that i almost couldn't stand it to the end. where cryptonomicon is affronting - the character of "s.t." goes even further: he treats his "girlfriend" like "the-one-to-fuck", always ephasize how much smarter and better prepared he is, thereby makes no mistakes at all (of course), behaves like an asshole when it comes to any conversation and thinks he is some james-bond-style macho-treehugger (???). the homo faber of boston. nevertheless the story of the eco-catastrophy is well researched and consistent. i prefered "sewer, gas, electric" by matt ruff in that genre.

- however pattern recognition by william gibson was beautiful to read. a tour-de-force for a media-agency-nerd with a brand/logo-allergy. gibson outlines that very cool character called casey pollard which was definitly my taste (style etc.). if you are stuck between the media-, ad- and computerbusiness i recommend you that book very much.

- "anthologie de l’humor noir" by andré breton is a collection of short stories and/or epitomes from well-known authors like jonathan swift and (unfortunately) desade. breton discusses the variety and the characteristics of black humour and the people who make it. very sophisticated.

- yeeehaw. just worked with "cocoa programming for mac os x" by aaron hillegras (the NeXT-cowboy from the nerd-ranch). i'm only missing some "howdies" and quid-spits.

right now i'm about to develop the "classic" section of my bookshelf. so there is nothing to say that haven't been said already....

there's no present - there's no present - in the future

2005-01-03T16:07:46Z

here is the list of my christmas presents 2004 my friends gave to me:

- a powerpuffgirl (buttercup) key fob (inflatable)
- a canned sage plant
- velcro cable fixers in black
- a color me arnold-book
- a fast(??) card game called lift-of
- a cd with songs by black sabbath played by an estonian medieval combo called rondellus
- a box of nurishments

you are all weirdos! i love you ;)

low tech

2004-11-26T13:30:44Z

my dear father gave me, like he thought, a great present: a pocket translator with 4 languages, calculator and real time clock.

NOW i'm feeling real depressed. does anybody remember the low-techs from "johnny mnemonic"? thank you, dad! first thing i did was trying out all f-words (etc.), but all i got was words like "fever" and "penguin". not very helpful.

customized processing

2004-11-24T11:35:12Z

last night at 11 p.m. i was pulled over by the german customs police. huh? yes, i was as surprised as the reader might be. i didn't know that the german customs office has the right to do that, while not at a frontier, airport, habour etc.. is that the new secret police? i was so amused that when the officer came up to my window i barked a "nothing to tariff" in his direction. reply "oh, sorry, we've mistaken you for somebody else with a similar beard and a similar car. good night, sir". err? what? i don't know what to make of this. please send in suggestions.

a kettle of brown

2004-11-22T12:10:52Z

studio braun played the schlachthof and it was hilarious. i especially liked the slide show about the history of LSD wherein the early tests on children and design flaws were revealed. if you are into abstruse, dada-like, twisted humor, "heinz strunk", "hans fuchs" and "20 euro" (aka bims brohm) are definitly your taste. when you are just looking for cheap laughts and stand-up comedy crap, get lost. the show was great and had it all: live prank phone calls with local fastfood restaurants and hotels, great songs like "computerfreak", "colani", "polizeiboot norbert "and "ute tasche vogel" etc. i never saw somebody making elektronic music with a beer trolley. their new cd "ein kessel braunes" is recommendable!

kochen ist krieg!

2004-11-18T14:47:59Z

hmm.... what to cook for dinner. i think i have a fast, hot and spicy curry.

today on cnn: 4 lies per minute (now faster!)

2004-11-18T11:04:20Z

could somebody please discharge the media of the united states ("keeping our people ignorant since 1776")?
watch cnn news and get theocracy/usa/war-propaganda for free:

1.) jaque chirac states his oppose position to the iraq war again by saying "i am not at all sure that one can say the world is safer". which is obviously true. the cnn spokesman replies to that news, that such a criticism is inapropriate. come one american media... face it... it is wrong, was wrong and will be wrong and it's done by your government! it fueled the terrorism in the whole (see statistics of juli 2004: more dead, more attacks, more fear).

2.)russia's new missle system: cnn dreams up a new cold war scenario! cool ;) let's spread the war!

3.)powell suggests iran is builing nukes: so they are next? "wmd" anyone? hey powell, did you forget about north korea while you still on it? and mr. wolfowitz: when is germany on schedule, since we're oh-too democratic by now?

4.)and then the cia-memo that stated that they didn't back bush and they never shaded intelligence. no no no. oh, please!

npr

2004-11-18T10:12:06Z

for those of you who never heard about "npr" (non-photorealistic rendering) i have a little prototype from my upcoming diploma thesis:

if you are interested in computer graphics and i don't mean flash or surfing the net for gibbery pictures you might appreciate this "newer" approach to it. i wonder why gooch & gooch have such a ugly website...

...and the shark, he has teeth and he wears them in his face

2004-11-18T09:44:54Z

just saw the threepenny opera last night. the original movie of 1931 which the nazis banned in 1933. it's a great masterpiece from the pen of berthold brecht which is still hideously up to date. the musik of kurt weill is grim, but also very honest. i liked it very much, eventhough i knew all that stuff thanks to the musentridusen. i recommend both!

the best thing in the movie are the beggar's protest signs with "euer ohr" (your ear) written on it. i dream up a scenario with thousands of people marching for "your ear"...shouting things like "that ear is yours - use it's force".

where it all begins - or - much ado about blogging

2004-11-17T11:00:48Z

there was a time, when people used so called "diaries" to collect their memories and notions. a literal diary for your mental diarrhea. somewhat later somebody else found such a journal and disclosed / exploited that piece of informations. so why not do it public in the first place? this is what it is all about? have fun by watching the things to come...